Artistic Endeavors

[barfle]

Hmmm, comfortable toe shoes. Seems like an oxymoron, but I don't know how necessary it might be.

I've known a handful of amateur ballerinas in my day (just casually! Really!) and those shoes are a common, no, make that UNIVERSAL complaint. While I know nothing of footwear, I'm not so far over the hill that I couldn't learn some new tricks. Of course, by the time I actually get something working, I'll be so old that... Oh, never mind.

[treebeau]

Originally posted by Selma in San Diego:
...The other nordic types in the area are making very calm dry sarcastic remarks about Ole...

Perhaps that comment was lost on several readers, but I, on the other hand cracked up. Dear readers, there is a type of joke called the "Lena and Ole (I always think of it as "Olie") joke...pronounced O-Lee. These jokes are popular in areas that have a large concentration of nordic folks (read: Minnesota). They always seem to portray Olie as a bumbling idiot. Sometimes there is a third character, a friend of Olie, but I can't remember his name. Here are two jokes to get you in the spirit.

1. Olie and his friend are standing on a bridge. Olie is smoking a pipe. They're both leaning over the rail looking down into the water. The friend says "Olie, you're going to drop your pipe into the water." and Olie says "No."

2. Lena is upset becaue Olie's libido has been low, so she tells him to start taking Viagra. After a few days Olie thanks her for recommending the Vigoro. Lena says "You idiot, I told you Viagra, not Vigoro. Vigoro is a fertilizer." And Olie replies "Well, that would explain the berries under my third sock."

Regards,
Tim (added the "under my third sock" part) B.

[Selma in Sandy Eggo]

Sven

[barfle]

Ya, sure.

[OperaTenor]

Tim, as usual, LMREO!

I've heard a few Lena and Ole jokes on The Prairie Home Companion. Not nearly as colorful as your examples, Tim.

Has anyone ever looked closely at the feet of an experienced ballerina? Not a pretty sight.

[dkm32]

[quote]Originally posted by operatenor:
[b] Has anyone ever looked closely at the feet of an experienced ballerina? Not a pretty sight.

[barfle]

As Frank Zappa once stated so clearly...

What's the ugliest part of your body?
What's the ugliest part of your body?
Some say your nose, some say your toes,
But I think it's your mind.

Present company excepted, of course.

[dkm32]

I always thought that feet were proof positive that the Creator of all thing, whoever she is, had a sense of humour. 'Course, the creation of the human race proves that by itself. Maybe she was carrying the joke too far?

[OperaTenor]

Maybe just a step, or two.....

[dkm32]

UGH, OT! UGH!!!!

[Selma in Sandy Eggo]

Originally posted by dkm32:
I always thought that feet were proof positive that the Creator of all thing, whoever she is, had a sense of humour.

I always thought it was giraffes that were proof of that. Clearly, a sense of whimsy at work.

[priya978]

My brain is certainly not a pretty sight. My feet are quite prettier.

[OperaTenor]

Originally posted by dkm32:
[b]UGH, OT! UGH!!!! [/b]

Aw, c'mon Donna, I thought that was Shos-league punning at its finest!

[Selma in Sandy Eggo]

An Ole joke for you all:

Sven and Ole wanted a fish for supper, so they took their poles and stools, filled a couple thermoses with coffee, got the ice auger, and went ice-fishing.

They set up the stools, Ole got the auger and he started to bore the hole into the ice. Then a big voice from above said "There are NO FISH under the ice."

Startled, Sven and Ole picked up their stuff and moved over twenty feet or so, and started over. As Sven was starting to work with the auger, the voice came again. "There are NO FISH under the ice."

Ole said, "Uh, God?"

And the voice said, "No, you idiots, I'm the ice rink manager."

[Catmando]

Hi! I'm new to the board and also talentless but I do appreciate the music played here. As far as talent goes, I don't even know how to spit(let alone competitively). I would like to know how to discover and foster any hint of creative (dormant) talent in me, enough to quit my day job. I need an alternative to flipping burgers after retiring or sticking happy faces on customers entering Walmart. Should I just start spitting a lot until I get good at it? Is competitive spitting tougher than curling?

Serenity's 1st post! And she mentions curling! You rock girl. I can't wait for curling season to start. Less than 2 months. Tuesdays and Wednesdays!

How's your spitting career coming along?

[Catmando]

[Serenity]

Hi! I'm new to the board and also talentless but I do appreciate the music played here. As far as talent goes, I don't even know how to spit(let alone competitively). I would like to know how to discover and foster any hint of creative (dormant) talent in me, enough to quit my day job. I need an alternative to flipping burgers after retiring or sticking happy faces on customers entering Walmart. Should I just start spitting a lot until I get good at it? Is competitive spitting tougher than curling?

Serenity's 1st post! And she mentions curling! You rock girl. I can't wait for curling season to start. Less than 2 months. Tuesdays and Wednesdays!

How's your spitting career coming along?

WOW! Why would you go back to this post? (There are some doozies born from inebriation, you know) Did you read all 158 pages of my posts? Do you have a manila folder with my name in your file cabinet?

I'd rather curl than spit; except for that one special moment in the near future when I lose composure and launch one at my supervisor to punctuate my resignation.

[Catmando]

WOW! Why would you go back to this post? (There are some doozies born from inebriation, you know) Did you read all 158 pages of my posts? Do you have a manila folder with my name in your file cabinet?

That was the day 1st posts from long time members were being dug from the grave.

No manila folder. Only clippings of all your 3,000+ posts pasted on the wall near the computer.

[Serenity]

Well.....I feel honored then I'm glad we share a sense of humor and thanks for starting that puns thread.

P.S. Are you hidden right now?

[Catmando]

Yes, I'm hiding from you. Hee hee!