Fix your job

[Serenity]

Coming back to work from vacation or the weekend is generally the pits. I assume very few of you love your job.

There is usually a co-worker (usually the boss) that makes work a living hell.

This thread is to vent, ask for advice, warn others of workplace pitfalls, etc.

[Serenity]

How to be a bad boss
10 tips for tormenting your employees:

1. Never trust anybody, especially your employees. Pay surprise visits when people call in sick. Make sure they are really home. Take their temperatures.

2. Take credit for your employees' good ideas and hard work. Don't recognize their contributions.

3. Stick to your guns. Being decisive is more important than learning from your mistakes. Changing your mind is a sign of weakness. Other points of view just undermine your authority.

4. Don't train your employees. Make it difficult or impossible for them to get other jobs or to do theirs with skill and enjoyment.

5. Reward punctuality and diligence above innovation and ingenuity. Employees' noses should be kept clean and to the grindstone, not poking around in things that don't concern them.

6. Keep secrets. Employees don't need to know about your company's mission and goals, its financial condition or even its day-to-day operation. Have lots of closed-door meetings; emerge loking mysterious and self-important.

7. Keep business and personal matters separate. Tell your employees to leave their problems at home. Reward long hours and penalise people who would rather spend evenings with the family than the photocopier. Forbid personal phone calls. Quash budding romances, dicourage friendships and for heaven's sake don't have a company picnic.

8. Run a tight ship. Monitor everything: e-mail, pencils, photocopies (especially around tax time). No coffee at the desk (easily discouraged by charging 50 cents a cup).

9. Make clear distinctions between senior staff and hourly peons. Regarding the latter, don't bother to learn their names. Call women "honey" and the men "boy". Regarding the former, take frequent long, boozy lunch breaks with them.

10. Pay minimum wage. Don't promote. Don't be concerned about high turnover. When your employees go on strike, outsource everything overseas, where laborers know their place and there are plenty of 9-year olds looking for jobs.

[dai bread]

Oh, the nostalgia! Just one quibble, Serenity, with #7. Long hours aren't rewarded either. The boss just thinks you're a sucker and loads you up with more.

[shostakovich]

Hey, Serenity, this job description and George Bush have a lot in common. He may be looking for a managerial position late this year. I hope, I hope, I hope, -----
Shos

[barfle]

I can add (the reason I left my last position) "don't recognize achievement." They told me (after eight years with the company) that I needed Microsoft certification. A year later (with basically no life, and in spite of them sending me on trips in the middle of the classes for the certification) I had it. I got a 4% raise, just like the guys who didn't get the certification.

[RC]

I love my job.
Seriously.
My boss is cheap by some standards but fair. He works harder than anyone in the company.
He does not nose into my personal business.
He trusts me to get my work done.
If I need to be taken to task, (really rare), he doESe not condescend or patronize, he simply tells me whats wrong - In return, I tell the truth; "I blew it, sorry", "I don't understand and need help", sometimes, "I really don't have time and I'm working on a better method, what do you think of..."

I've had just about every nastiness imaginable including two cases of blatant sexual harassment.
I was beginning to think this job didn't exist.

Sorry...we are not currently hiring.

<small>[ 07-12-2004, 09:02 AM: Message edited by: RC ]</small>

[treebeau]

I have a good position in a good company and have always liked what I do. The people I work for now are the best in 15 years.

However, I have survived many layoffs and seen too many good people lose their jobs. Of course a lot of bad goes out with the few good.

Layoffs come with little or no warning and are just about annual events. If I could change one thing it would be layoffs. I always feel like I could be next and like I'm on a razor's edge.

Regards,
Tim B.

[RC]

Layoffs come with little or no warning and are just about annual events. If I could change one thing it would be layoffs. I always feel like I could be next and like I'm on a razor's edge.

I can understand that. I worked for the airlines for many years.
United gave me the option of working at Dulles (ugh) or layoff so I took the layoff and went to work for Braniff. What an idiot.

Braniff promptly went bankrupt and left me high and dry. About $3000.00 worth of free labor.

Took a part time job with a charter outfit called Odyssey International who also went bankrupt - oversold their last flight ever, left me at the ticket counter with about 20 people trying to get home to Canada, (they weren't too happy). Bankrupt also. I didn't get paid for my last week. I had a baby the next day.

Fool me once... so I became an accountant and I've only been laid off once since then...lol

My spouse is also in the airline industry and was on layoff until recently when the company finally gave up and just cut about 100 pilots loose.

Its been particularly tough since 9/11.

sucks.

[Bones]

When you have an "I Hate My Job" day, try this.

On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section and purchase a rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson.
Be very sure you get this brand.

Take out the literature and read it carefully.

You will notice that in small print there is a statement,
"Every rectal thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson is personally tested."

Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times:

"I am so glad I do not work for quality control at Johnson and Johnson."

HAVE A NICE DAY AND REMEMBER, THERE IS ALWAYS
SOMEONE ELSE WITH A JOB THAT IS WORSE THAN YOURS

[barfle]

I have to say that my current job, although it's extremely bizarre, is an excellent job. You know exactly how you are doing, and exactly what you need to get done, and exactly how much time you have to do it. I'm making great money, I get about three people's worth of time off, and I have an excellent set of fringe benefits.

But patent examining sure ain't what I spent all those years getting an engineering degree for, and after getting used to the weather in Southern California for 42 years, I can't exactly say I prefer the weather in Virginia (they are expecting up to two inches of rain per hour this afternoon).

[shostakovich]

Retirement is nice, but it allows more time to pay attention to politics. So I've been able to look closely at Horny Bill's 2nd term and Bumblehead's 1st (and last, I hope). It hasn't been fun. I hope you guys have better luck in retirement.
Sweet-tempered, once

[OperaTenor]

Originally posted by RC:
United gave me the option of working at Dulles (ugh) or layoff so I took the layoff and went to work for Braniff. What an idiot.

Braniff promptly went bankrupt and left me high and dry. About $3000.00 worth of free labor.

Took a part time job with a charter outfit called Odyssey International who also went bankrupt - oversold their last flight ever, left me at the ticket counter with about 20 people trying to get home to Canada, (they weren't too happy). Bankrupt also. I didn't get paid for my last week. I had a baby the next day.

What I'd like to know is: What did you do to run those companies into bankruptcy?

[Serenity]

Have you ever had a boss who was smart, witty and just the right amount of driven yet you didn't love working for her? You aren't alone. I have a classic passive-aggressive boss. I am suffering until I learn some strategies for dealing with her.

Her management style is mercurial. For example, she will tell me she doesn't care about my hours as long as I get my work done, then becomes a stickler about my comings and goings. Her demeanor is "pals-y wals-y", except when she unexpectedly starts brooding and treats me like a slow child.

Passive-aggressive is a term (and a personality type) prevalent in the workplace. Most people we think of acting this way are really demonstrating more of a personality style.

They don't articulate what they want but they believe you know what that is anyway. As a result, they punish you when they're disappointed. In their mind, you've asked for it.

For example, a boss might want you to perform a project in a certain way, yet not tell you what she wants. When your execution differs from her expectations, she might not voice her displeasure until you're in a meeting and she puts you on the spot.

Passive-aggressives engage in retribution. They're very alert to signs of disrespect. And when they perceive you're not following orders (whether that's true or not), you feel their wrath.

How to Spot Them

True passive-aggressive personalities are closely related to people who are paranoid and three behaviors can set them apart.

They appear very charming and cooperative.
They procrastinate. They're always late with projects, commitments and meetings because they don't like you. They're penalizing you.
They're stubborn. You can't coach them out of their ways. And because they're generally intelligent, they have very good excuses for their behavior. Your boss may not fit the clinical definition, but some of those behaviors may still seem all too familiar.

How to Handle Them

So how can you work with a sneaky, undermining smartie pants? Whether they're clinically passive-aggressive or not, here are four strategies.

1. Don't show your anger. You can't change this person. You simply want to present the facts and focus on how you can work better together.

2. Keep them well informed about what you're doing and where you are in a project. Use a two-part email system to keep track of work -- include their requests in your email responses. Try not to rely on them. It's always easier to get forgiveness than permission with passive-aggressives in particular, so make decisions on your own and kowtow later.

3. Be realistic in your expectations. Women like other women to treat them as equals but bosses have more power. Your supervisor may be your moral equivalent, but in the office, she's the big cheese.

4. Flatter them. It may not get you exactly what you want, but it will minimize your suffering.
I will never get the credit I deserve while working under her. So will I use the best management technique for a passive-aggressive boss. I will end up leaving.

[OperaTenor]

I always thought public execution was a good way of dealing with PA bosses.

[RC]

What I'd like to know is: What did you do to run those companies into bankruptcy?

Too funny!!
Running an airline seems to be like owning a boat. You know, hole in the water you poor money into.
Name one that isn't in bankruptcy or hasn't been in bankruptcy and hasn't asked for Fed assistance and their names are: Jet Blue and American Trans Air, neither one employs in my area. :p

[Serenity]

Try this airline RC:
http://www.skyhighairlines.com

[RC]

ROFL!!!!!!!
I've never seen anything so funny!!!!!

Passing this on to spouse right now...lol...LOL...lol

Hey everyone, please go check out the link above...

[OperaTenor]

Serenity, LMREO!

That site must be put out by the same folks who do the Landover Baptist website.

[barfle]

That one was pretty good. This one really exists, and they have service in Florida.

I don't know if you're qualified, though.

<small>[ 07-14-2004, 09:46 AM: Message edited by: barfle ]</small>

[RC]

barfle,

what do you mean " I don't know if you're qualified", thats me in the top left corner of the home page.