Let's hear it for Wal-Mart!

[shostakovich]

Driving in nearby Bloomfield, CT today, my wife and I saw signs in a couple of yards to boycott Walmart. It seems the homes are threatened by "eminent domain" for the purpose of selling the land to Walmart for a new store. It doesn't seem legal to forcibly buy out homes for a PRIVATE interest. BOO Walmart! BOO Bloomfield!
Shos

[Bones]

Originally posted by barfle:

Originally posted by operatenor:
[b] The Post Office is involved in the conspiracy too?! Will it ever end?

Whaddya think of that, Bones? [/b]

We were going to put greeters at the doors of all the post offices, just like Walmart. The problem arose when we couldn't undercut anyone else's prices because nobody else sell stamps. Just wait til we start selling Chinese shoes at post offices!

Maybe we need a patent on that idea.

[OperaTenor]

You can cut your overhead if you hire Nazi scientists.

[Gabriele]

[quote]Originally posted by operatenor:
[b] You can cut your overhead if you hire Nazi scientists. :p

[Bones]

They could experiment on how to censor Chinese shoes at the Waffle Hut.

[jmfryar]

Gnomes of Zurich are part of the Illuminati conspiracy...they are in charge of the funding...among other things...

I buy my stamps at Stop and Shop...at the same price as the post office...don't think they could undercut them? Oh...wait...the post office is supplying them...it's a conspiracy!

[haggis]

Wal-Mart To Offer More Books That Few People Read
(2003-05-18) -- Wal-Mart announced today that it will offer more books and recordings that most people don't want. The move comes in response to an article in The New York Times which said that the nation's biggest retailer sells too many conservative and faith-oriented books and videos effectively homogenizing the culture.

"We have no right to force our customers to buy millions of copies of Bernard Goldberg, Ann Coulter, Michael Savage, the Left Behind series, the Bible and Veggie Tales videos," said an unnamed Wal-Mart spokesman. "It's our obligation to occupy shelf space with things that our customers don't want to buy."

Editors at The New York Times said they still may exclude Wal-Mart sales figures when compiling the NYT best-seller list.

"If you look at Wal-Mart sales," said an unnamed editor, "You would think that America was made up of generally-conservative people who have faith in God. Here in New York we know that's not true. The best-seller list should reflect the real American culture as we know it."

[jmfryar]

I read Haggis post and thought...what a clever bit of humor...and then paused for a moment over the NYT quote and thought...he must know people at the NYT to have written what would generally be an accurate comment...then thought...wait a minute...and did a search...and THAT'S A REAL ARTICLE...with a REAL QUOTE (should have tried to keep the link to the Michael Moore book, though)

Good to know that the intellectual elite of the New York Times can make Wal-Mart look good...sigh...

[haggis]

jm, it's an made-up article from Scrappleface

He makes up tongue-in-cheek articles based on recent events to show how ridiculous some real news articles are.

[jmfryar]

Sigh...ran across it on Jewish World review...on closer inspection, the refer back to scrappleface...

It's just that it sounds TOO real...but all good satire does...therein lies the humor...

[Shapley]

I thought It might be from "The Onion". It had the flavor of an Onion piece (pun intended).

V/R
Shapley

[jmfryar]

I read that pretty religously...their humor is broader and a little more obvious...actually, I realize that I've gotten in a bit of a pattern at lunch:

www.thesmokinggun.com
www.snopes.com
www.aintitcoolnews.com
www.drudgereport.com
www.theonion.com
www.comedycentral.com

humor...it makes the world go round...

[barfle]

To which you could add

www.dailyrotten.com and
www.comedy101radio.com

[jmfryar]

sheesh...I waste enough time around here...great...more cool websites...ahhh...who needs a paycheck...

[haggis]

<"Sorry ma'am, we're hi-jacking this thread for your own good!, you can find it i the hi-jack thread impound lot after we've used it">

WARNING LABEL:

Visiting the below link will forever skew your interpretation of

"La Donna Mobile"from the opera "Rigoletto."

Wimps, tenors, girly boy and Verdi lovers are cautioned to avoid this link.

You've been warned; trespassers will be violated!

[jmfryar]

Now that they've had (commercial) success turning La Boheme into a modern musical I wonder what's the next one they will maassacre in the name of pop culture?

[barfle]

Haggis, that's almost as bad as hampsterdance was!

[jmfryar]

It was still better than Rent

[OperaTenor]

Haggis, this tenor tries to have a sense of humor! ROTFLMREO!!!

 

[jmfryar]

Thinking Hamsters or Elephants would have made Rent more interesting...

wondering if giving the audience automatic weapons would improve performances...